Tagcarissa villacorta

How to Make Your Social Network WORK for You

WOW! My guest for my segment “Edumacate Me!” really prepared a lot of stuff for us!

“Edumacate Me!” is a segment that’s part of the radio show called “The G-Spot” w/ DJ Vince G where we try to learn something new every Sunday from the guests that come on air with us at Mellow 94.7

My guest this week is Ms. Carissa Villacorta, the author of the book called “Surreality” and one of the Top 100 Most Influential Filipinas in the US.

Carissa Villacorta talking points for Mellow 94.7 guesting with DJ Vince G

July 25, 2010   830am to 930am

Carissa Villacorta has been practicing Public Relations for the past 8 years in New York City, with clients in Manhattan and the Hamptons

(and author of Surreality)

Contact her at www.carissavillacorta.com

Email carissa.villacorta@gmail.com

TALK TOPIC:

How To Make Your Social Network Work For You (and everyone else)

We always hear about

Intellectual Quotient

Emotional Quotient from a popular book

How about Social Quotient

How to grow in social intelligence

I feel that endorsements and interviews are the two top ways to get a job. So in a way, they’re results of people liking you enough to recommend you or hire you.

How to make the change from being socially inept to becoming socially adept

I am not claiming to be a teacher, as I myself am still a student of life and relationship building

I’ve realized that when I meet new people, I have a tendency to ask not only

How are you?

But also

“How can I help you?”

Though I don’t always say it aloud.

We all appreciate help. Whether in finding jobs, clients, baby sitters, PR opportunities, or making our dreams come true.

Everybody wants to be Cinderella, but they’re not always successful because they want it for themselves. My suggestion is that we all become Fairy Godmothers to each other –We can introduce them to prince charming, make them a dress and take them to the ball. Because only when we are all Fairy Godmothers to each other can we all become Cinderellas too – our dreams come true.

Noone is ever self-made. We are all products of the kindness and generosity of people we’ve met along the way.

And so you can never say thank you enough.

PR for me does not only stand for  public relations, but it means personal relations

You only have one chance to make an encounter count. People may not meet you ever again. Or you may not meet them ever again. So make the 10 minutes they choose to spend with you a positive and pleasant time.

It only takes a moment, to make, or break an impression.

•         A moment is a retail of time.
Make the moment count.

•         It’s not only about the peso counter, but also about the personal encounter
From the onstage impression to the offstage experience

MAKE THAT ENCOUNTER COUNT

Don’t give them a chance to say cute nga pero snob. The best thing people can say about you is “Gwapo na, mabait pa.” Or “Mabait na, guwapo pa.”

What’s the use of knowing a lot of people to look for a job if none of them want to help you? You know those people you don’t ever want to see again? You don’t want to be one of those people right?

George Washington said in his Rules of Civility and Decent Behavior from the 1700s

Everything done in company must be in consideration of everyone who is present

Always be considerate of people who are on the same room, same street, same country – people who are going to be affected, sometimes disturbed by what you do. Ask Is this right, is this decent, is this considerate?

==

HOW TO GROW IN SOCIAL INTELLIGENCE

Don’t drop names of people you don’t really know or don’t know you

It’s not what you know, it’s who you know.

It’s not who you know it’s who knows you.

It’s not who knows you, its who likes you.

Don’t overpromise. Don’t talk too much. Just do your best, pray for the rest and let the results do the talking.

Try not to backstab. You don’t want to see bloody backs everywhere right? You don’t want someone to have a bloody back. You don’t want a bloody back. So don’t stab people with sharp words, especially behind their backs.

Strive not to improve others, but to improve yourself in patience, tolerance and understanding.

Words can break relationships. Especially those you hear from other people.

Conversations are two-way dialogues. They’re not monologues. There was a guy I’ve hung out with thrice already  before he found out (from someone else) where I worked and what I do.  Then he seemed surprised. That’s because he never asked me.  He kept on talking about himself for hours on end. And I didn’t want to interrupt his monologue.

Here are the top recent realizations I have while learning about PR or what is commonly known as public relations, but what I call Person Relations

1. Showing up is the greatest compliment. Staying in touch is the second best compliment.

2. The 24-hour cancellation policy should apply not only in restaurant or hotel reservations but also in social commitments. It’s hard to book another guest, as much as it is to book a new appointment in your day.

3 It has always been my job / second nature to invite friends and strangers to events and goings on. But I only invite up to three times. Decline it, and you will not hear from me again. (Ping Pong)

4. Just say yes. I’m a yes girl. Yes to all invites, openings and opportunities. Let the wind take you to doors that open up for you. And some doors are opened up through invites.

5. I’m allergic to flakes. I hope noone lets it happen that they’re described as flakes. They’re people who say they’d come but actually don’t.

Inversely, I like it when people come on time – plus points for early. Reliability is key.

5.  Respect your word. I strive to live by ‘And the word was made flesh.’ They say ‘don’t say it if you don’t mean it.’ I say, don’t say it if you won’t do it. Make it real.

6. The easiest thing to do is to be happy for other people’s success. I don’t know why other people find it hard.

7. People must have a balance of confidence and humility. There are some who are painfully shy, and there are some who are PAINFULLY confident. Both are equally disturbing. Strike a balance and you won’t turn others away.

8. I don’t understand how people can make saying sorry a habit. How about not doing anything that requires an apology? And only say you’ll make it up if you really would.

Confident but not cocky. Cultured but not flashy.

Humility, gratitude, honesty, courtesy and genuine interest in others are still key.

Confident but not self-absorbed.
Well-bred but not flaunting.
Accomplished but not flashy.
Initiates but not flaky.
Humility and genuine interest in others are still key.

Rule of the world is give and take. We should all start in giving.

Start happy.

Live in peace.

Show up. Keep your word. And keep in touch.

I love socially adept people. They just know what to say, when to say it. How do they do it, and when did they learn it? Kudos to their parents!

Cover of Surreality by Carissa Villacorta


Sunday Bloody Book Review 2 – “SURREALITY” by Carissa Villacorta

Sunday Bloody Book Review 2 –

“Surreality” by Carissa Villacorta

Surreality is a wonderful book about a girl who humbly finds her place in the world.

It’s a story about opening your eyes and allowing yourself to see the wonders all around you.

Carissa Villacorta has an AMAZING way of taking her readers on a “roller coaster” ride with her while she slowly realizes that being a pea in the pond just means that you have a bigger pond to love and explore.

A must read for anyone searching for their own place in this crazy big world.

My favorite quote from the author is that “Time is gold, money is paper.”

I only have three rating scales for my book reviews-

1. Must read
2. OK read but you’ll live without it
3. Don’t bother

This book, Surreality by Carissa Villacorta,  is a MUST READ! It’s a lot of fun to read and will give you some inspirational insights on the world we live in today. 

 

Surreality Summary

Contemporary life — in all its shapes, sizes and imperfections –is the subject of Surreality, Carissa Villacorta’s acclaimed collection of essays. As a young Filipina surrounded by people, events and experiences in New York City, she ponders on life’s mysteries: its joys, conflicts, and compromises. A big theme to take on, but she writes with specificity and simplicity; her heart is for the taking as she turns glib notions into impassioned dissertations for us, the living wounded. It’s old-fashioned wisdom mingled with new-age wonder: a singular mix that Surreality brims with and basks in.

Carissa’s sense of empathy is charming, natural and bountiful – the extraordinary gift that she shares with her readers. If her fan base is huge, it is no accident (see the quotes below). The effusiveness of people’s responses is matched only by Carissa’s commitment to inspire her readers in rich, incandescent ways. As you will discover by embracing this book, her words are the kind that we need to read in today’s postmodern world. The only way to get a clearer, sharper view of life would be a visit to an eye doctor: no fun compared to the wit and vitality that Ms. Villacorta brings to each of her delightfully entertaining pieces.

surreality-by-carissa-villacorta-book-cover

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